This August Marty flew out to crazy CO to hang out and go climbing. He arrived while I was still working to "acclimate" to the altitude before we hit the Big Boobies up in Wyoming. [Author's note: the Grand Tetons in Wyoming were so-named by some frogs...I mean Frenchies back in the day because they look like Grand Tetons which in english means giant chesticles. You'll note that I use both the original French version of their name as well as American euphamisms whenever possible. For example, "them knockers up in Wyo" is equivalent to "the range known as the Grand Tetons in the great state of Wyoming"] We had a good time. We made some great new secret energy/rehydration drink we like to call Funk-Ade. You can have some if you want but we will never reveal the secret ingredients.

8-2-2000

Marty and I hit East Side of tunnel 2. He flashed Pony Up, 5.8, and I repeated Poker Face 5.9 to warm up. He then led and nearly flashed People's Choice a 5.10c/d but hung on the initial 10c slab section after his foot popped though he nailed the 10d sloper slab up top on the second pitch.

What a climb! People's Choice is obviously a classic. The upper section is a dihedral with fun and exciting exposure...

8-3-00

I called in sick to work and we headed out to Eldorado Canyon(Note to future employers, I was "on the bench" and had nothing to do so it's justified, besides, if you're the kind of company that keeps its consultants inside on a day with nothing to do when the sun is shining and the climbing is nice I don't want to work for you anyway). We tried to do the 5.6 Windy Ridge on Wind Tower, but I got off-route in the beginning and ended up on a 4th class piece of junk until the first belay ledge where I found the real climb and started up. I forgot to protect Marty as he made that traverse…bad leader, bad leader. (Scary section to second, but easy enough not to worry too much) The route overall though is a classic. I linked the first 2 pitches and Marty sent the final pitch which involved a crazy move over an overhanging-kneebar mantle roof type thing where the crack was full of piton scars like none other. I followed him up that section only to stick my fingers into a hueco that was home to a wasp that proceeded to sting my arm and pester me until I left his home alone. We walked around the top to the normal rap and walk off and made it down past some folks from AmeriCorps who were working on the trail next to Wind Tower.

The weather had been beautiful all day. As we climbed Wind Ridge we watched folks on Little Eiger climbing the Bastille Crack and WerksUp. As we walked down, thunderheads rolled in and people started bailing left and right. Marty and I wanted to do the Bastille Crack, but were concerned about the crowds…this was our chance. As we geared up, two hardcore chicks who had just done the 10c Bastille Crack variation soloed up past the first bolts to try to remove a booty cam. Soloed. A pitch and a half. Oh well. I led the first pitch and it gave me serious vapors. I was Elvis Legging all over the place. I brought Marty up to me so he could lead the second pitch, which he did until he ran out of gear and gumption, so he set up a belay station and brought me up 3/4ths of the pitch. I led the last 20 feet to the booty pin and hex left by the last party where Marty and I bailed. He rapped down first and at the first belay stance he nearly stepped on the hand of a guy who had ropegun soloed up to the bolts to set a top-rope for a 11 or something…We got down just in time to hit rush hour on the way home before my goodbye dinner after my summer internship. I really like piton scars on climbs even though they aren't natural. I like them because they are reminders climbing's history, of the changing ethics of climbing, of the pioneer's who put up routes in Eldo canyon like Pat Ament and Layton Kor, and they also make great tri-cam placements.

8-4-00

Marty, Nikki, and I went to Golden to climb at North Table, but the weather had other ideas. We took a rain check and headed into the Coors Brewery for a "short tour" of the part where they give out free beers (they are small). We didn't sample any though, promise. When we walked outside we saw that the rain had stopped. Somewhat pissed (In the European sense of the word), we headed back up to North Table where Nikki read "The God of Small Things," I led Lemons, Limes, and Tangerines but hung on it, and Marty led the 5.9 left of Thelma & Louise in a similar fashion. He lowered off of two draws and then I tried leading it. 2 bolts up, thunder cracked. Marty sent me to the ground and we debated about what to do to get the 4 draws. That were up there. We ended up waiting out the storm for a half hour and then grabbed them.

8-5-00

Saturday morning, we headed out for Wyoming.

Marty: A woman in Burger King asks Greg and me (Marty) if we live together or are related after listening to Greg nag me about the way I answer questions (Greg's note: it takes him 5 tries to respond to your question on occasion)…Then moments before I ask how much water the rubber floormats can hold, Greg spills his entire soda right at my feet.

Greg: Pinedale Wyoming, while home to the Mountain Man museum, is not a hot-bed of intellectualism or wittiness. "Otis Spunkmaster" Muffins have an interesting salty milky sauce on them. We contemplated knocking on the Jehova's Witnesses door here and asking, "Do you have a moment to talk about how God doesn't exist?"

I want to be a painter when I see Western sunsets.

We pulled in to Jackson's central plaza around 9:30 (UPOC on time) and Steve jumped on the hood Dukes of Hazards style hoping to impress the locals he'd been chatting up as they cruised the loop. We got some food, hung out, ran around, and peed in the park (the public bathrooms were closed so we pissed on the building that houses them) Yeah building!

We cruised into a campground around 12:30 and passed out.

8-6-00 Sunday morning

We woke up at 4:00 and a half hour later, packed up, and drove to the String Lake parking lot, where we cooked breakfast (oatmeal), racked up, and headed out for Symmetry Spire at 7:20. The hike was mostly the same as last time, though we were earlier and the sun later so the light on the trees was beautiful. The gulley was empty which made trailfinding a little easier and we climbed up the 5th class section only seconds before hearing and spotting a moose that was eating shrubbery right next to the trail we had hiked up. I had never seen a moose before, and it was beautiful, especially to see such a magnificent animal in it's own natural environment.

We found the right start for the climb, ate some food, and started to put on our harnesses and rope up. After about a pitch of unroped climbing, we set up an anchor and Steve led off on the first pitch. He made it a half rope length before the rope drag was too much and he set up a belay at the base of the dihedral pitch. Steve trailed two ropes and when he was set he pulled them up. Marty held onto several loops of rope and his rope came taught first. Then, Steve pulled in my rope only until mine was taught and Marty had some slack. I started climbing first and when I had climbed the length of his slack and Marty's rope was tight, he undid the belay and we climbed at the same pace the rest of the way up with him a few feet below me. I climbed first and removed all of the pro, leaving pieces and clipping Marty in where he might face a nasty pendulum fall. We continued with this system for the rest of the day and became smooth enough with it to bring up the climbers at different speeds although no one fell and I question how well the belayer would hold a fall initially.

Marty was the next to lead up the dihedral pitch. It's a tough section with several manky fixed pins. Marty climbed up to a V in the rock where he set up a belay. Steve and I followed up until we noticed a better belay ledge a few feet further up. I led the 10 feet to that ledge and then body belayed them up to me.

This ledge was immediately before the Nose Pitch and had a nice booty .75 Camalot we tried to remove but were unable to. Damn that brand new booty gear. From the nose ledge, I led to the right of the actual nose in a nice dihedral/crack up to the next ledge where I ran around like a chicken with my body cut off trying to find the route. When I finally did, it was some sketchy bad pro climbing up to a really nice long face pitch that was great…aside from the heinous rope drag I sentence myself to earlier in the pitch.

From this belay point, Marty took the lead and tried left, then more left, then right and finally far right to make it up the next pitch. I slept while Steve belayed Marty. Then, after Steve and I followed, Marty slept as I belayed Steve on a wildly exposed crack that was great to watch Steve on. At the top of this pitch, we realized how late in the day it really was (the sun had set on our descent route) and decided to pack up shop and just run the rest of the ridge solo. We put our shoes on, packed up, and headed towards the peak to try and find the rap-bolts. It turns out that a double rope rappel off of some booty slings is possible, so we backed it up and sent Marty first. That's right, Marty, the guinea pig. It took another rap off of a tree we slung to make it to the gulley floor which we felt was a faster option than hiking the steep scree slope over to the gulley.

And thus began the nightmare portion of the trip. For the next 4 or so hours we hiked down the gulley. We fell all over the place, tripped, got bruised, and generally didn't have fun. We were out of food and water, dehydrated and hypoglycemic, and trying to route-find in the dark. It was bad. We finally made it down to the car and looked at the clock: 12:30am. From there, it was back to the Climber's Ranch which we found full so we car camped and passed out.

8-7 Monday

We woke up around noon, ate, and bozed all damn day. We did nothing practically. Just went to Jackson Mountaineering, ogled the hot women in Jackson, got beta on Teewinot, ate, and recuperated. It was nice, but felt like a waste of a day.

We had discussed doing a route every day while we were there, including Exum ridge. I think the rest day was not only the best idea, but completely necessary. It felt great just to be there with the Tetons looming in the distance and be able to contemplate and eyeball routes. It's a chance to bask in the feelings of such pioneers as Glenn Exum as he pondered the different approaches...

8-8 Tuesday

We woke up butt ass early and headed for the Lupine Meadows parking lot to hit up Teewinot. We were surprised to find it really packed at the butt-crack of dawn (which we watched from the parking lot as we ate our granola bar breakfast).

Teewinot was a great climb. It is somewhere around 3500 ft in a day, and a beautiful (and sharp!) peak. We made it a point to improve our speed during this ascent remembering Symmetry Spire as a lesson in keeping pace. As we approached the Idol and the Worshipper, we encountered a number of sections of 4th and low 5th class climbing. As we talked about it later, we were surprised at the relative comfort we had in completely free soloing those 5th class sections in our boots, some of them with some decent exposure. The peak was amazing. Out in the distance you could see the line of smoke on the horizon from the forest fires in the northwest. The point of the peak was literally a small point that the 3 of us could barely fit upon, and the sides of the peak were sheer drops of over 500 feet or so. The altitude finally started to get to Marty while we were sitting atop the peak (hey, he's from Iowa...) and my head was throbbing, so we ate some food, sucked down more water and started heading down. This time with plenty of daylight to go...

8-9 Wednesday

We woke up in a truck stop parking lot to continue our cruise down to Denver, after which we cleaned up and ate food.

8-10 Thursday

We hit up Clear Creek for some final sport climbs before heading out. We went to Little Eiger and hit up the 5.9 and then tried the 2 5.10ds which end on the same bolts. The 5.10ds were ugly, but as a team we finally were able to hang dog our way up them.

I think this was the first time we really worked a route at the peak of our abilities. 10d is definitely a step up in level and took a large amount of energy and skill at working out the sequence of the route.

My final notes for the trip:
For the future, I need to practice placing pieces lots more, route-finding, and just get better at climbing quickly. I'm not sure what all factors there are that we need to work on to get faster at multi-pitch trad, but if I want to get the compressor then I'm definitely going to need to get faster.