Saturday morning I felt surprisingly good at 5:30 when I woke up to a hot cup of cider and bowl of oatmeal that Steve had prepared. After breakfast and a beta swapping session with other climbers, we headed to our cars and started sorting gear. On the way to the cars, I looked up for the first time and saw three giant peaks overlooking the camp. They are quite possibly the most beautiful mountains I have seen to date. Massive cliffs alternate with glaciers and couloirs to form 3 giant...um...breasts more or less. By 7:00 we left the parking lot and headed to the String Lake parking lot. From String Lake, it was a 2 mile walk to the base of the "Horse Trail." We could have taken the boat from Jenny Lake across to the base of the Horse Trail, but that would increase the cost of our stay in the park by a third and we just weren't having it. At the base of the Horse Trail we met up with two Jackson climbers who showed us the point where the Symmetry Spire trail breaks off from the Horse Trail (it's the first major one on the right) and they showed us the path from that point on (follow the trail up until you can't go any higher, then make a right up the gulley behind symmetry spire until you see a well worn platform). We of course couldn't follow these instructions. We made the long hike in what seemed like an eternity.

The whole way we were awestruck by the beauty of the Tetons, the river running down the gulley, the wild-flowers that were growing alongside the trail, and the giant peaks surrounding us. As we approached the top, we grew increasingly exhausted. Near the top we found an area that looked like it might be the right spot, but the climb above it didn't match the topo in the book. We looked around a little more as hunger and dehydration set in and finally decided to simply start climbing hoping to find the route higher up.

Steve led the first pitch of unknown difficulty. Sections of it were as tough or tougher than he'd ever lead on trad. We decided to carry all of our gear (clothing, boots, food, water bottles) in case we needed anything along the way (mistake 1). I had the horrible task of carrying both bags on the first pitch. I think that I had a harder time following than Steve did leading. On the second pitch, we tried to do some route finding and then I headed off. After running it out on easy 5th class climbing, I got to a dihedral with short finger cracks in it. I started up and after placing one piece got to a stance where I didn't want to climb any higher without pro, I was unsteady, and I had a perfect placement for an Alien but no Aliens with me (mistake 2). I panicked (mistake 3). After about 5 minutes of Elvis Leg and freaking out trying to place nuts, I backed off and cursed under my breath for a while. Steve offered, "Maybe look around a little." Peering around a corner, I saw a booty nut hanging out of an overhanging crack. Duh. I started up this section and really enjoyed the climbing. It was some great 5.6 with a roof, some dihedrals, a lie back, everything. Steve followed me, with bags, and again had a horrible time. We hung out at the belay station for a little while pondering the thunderheads forming on the horizon. We sat at the belay station and chatted for a while about what we would do differently a month later when we tried again: bring lighter shoes, more water, more food, 1 nylon jacket and hat each, and find the right starting point.

The hike back down probably took us as long or longer than the way up. It was still beautiful, but we'd had our fill of that and just wanted to get down, get some water and food, and pass out. After another couple of hours, we finally made it down to the base of the Horse Trail and started walking back towards the String Lake parking lot. As we walked along the (thankfully) flat trail and chatted, we came upon a bear in the middle of the trail eating termites out of a tree. Fortunately, Steve kept his wits and was well versed in dealing with bears. It looked young, so he started looking around for a momma bear while telling me to continue facing the bear and walking backwards. When we got out of sight of the bear, we turned tail and walked a little faster back to the boat dock. We were going to take the boat back, tell the rangers and either hitch a ride or hike back to the Stringer Lake parking lot. On the way, we just happened upon the setting for a combination of sexual fantasies like I've never known: a gorgeous MILF (Mother I'd like to Funk, which doesn't mean I want to do the hustle with her), with 2 mildly attractive daughters (probably jail-bait) carrying a video camera. Need I say more? We were very nice to them, informed them of the bear up ahead, and then we all decided that a group of 5 probably wouldn't get attacked if we all talked so we headed down the trail gabbing to "protect us from the bear." We never did see the bear again, though some crazy guy with 30 binoculars around his neck said, "look over there. See that brown thing in the bushes that isn't moving? That's a bear."

As we walked back to the car, the idea of swimming got better and better. When we got to the bridge over the Jenny Lake feeder stream, we knew it was on. We hopped into butt-ass cold water for one of the more refreshing dips I've ever had followed by the wet-feet-not-gonna-put-my-shoes-on-so-I'm-stumbling-painfully-over-sharp-rocks walk back to the car where we downed a half gallon of water and ate everything that looked mildly edible. We got to the car at 6:30 for a car to car trip time of 11 hours including time wasted going back and forth on the trail with the bear and MILF.